Bystander Effect Definition
A phenomenon where the greater the number of people present, the less likely people are to help an individual in distress.
It's Not About The Nail
What if the story was flipped? What if it was your friend who's an unbeliever? You see the figurative nail in their head, but at what point do you say something about it?
"Many people are looking for an ear that will listen. They do not find it among Christians, because Christians are talking where they should be listening."
People are desperate for someone to listen!
If we are willing to listen, we will be tapping into a natural resource. If we show respect and courtesy by listening, we find others will begin to listen back. When we win their hearts, we earn the right to be heard. In fact, people will start asking you for your opinion.
James 1:19 (NIV)
My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry,
James 1:19 Formula
Be quick to listen, slow to speak, slow to become angry.
John 4:7-9 (NIV)
When a Samaritan woman came to draw water, Jesus said to her, “Will you give me a drink?”
(His disciples had gone into the town to buy food.)
The Samaritan woman said to him, “You are a Jew and I am a Samaritan woman. How can you ask me for a drink?” (For Jews do not associate with Samaritans. )
Think About It
Jesus risked being accused of being ceremonially unclean because he was accepting a drinking cup that was handled by a Samaritan. She even tries to help him out by pointing it out to him.
But that didn't stop Jesus from engaging in meaningful conversation. He was willing to overlook even this deep cultural value for the sake of reconciling one person to His Father.
Mark 5:24-35 (NIV)
So Jesus went with him. A large crowd followed and pressed around him.
And a woman was there who had been subject to bleeding for twelve years.
She had suffered a great deal under the care of many doctors and had spent all she had, yet instead of getting better she grew worse.
When she heard about Jesus, she came up behind him in the crowd and touched his cloak,
because she thought, “If I just touch his clothes, I will be healed.”
Immediately her bleeding stopped and she felt in her body that she was freed from her suffering.
At once Jesus realized that power had gone out from him. He turned around in the crowd and asked, “Who touched my clothes?”
“You see the people crowding against you,” his disciples answered, “and yet you can ask, ‘Who touched me?’ ”
But Jesus kept looking around to see who had done it.
Then the woman, knowing what had happened to her, came and fell at his feet and, trembling with fear, told him the whole truth.
He said to her, “Daughter, your faith has healed you. Go in peace and be freed from your suffering.”
While Jesus was still speaking, some people came from the house of Jairus, the synagogue leader. “Your daughter is dead,” they said. “Why bother the teacher anymore?”
There are stories after stories of Jesus stopping to listen to people. You have to realize that the only way Jesus was able to speak truth in love to people was because he earned the right to be heard. And it started with listening! So remember, be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry.